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Joke of the Day

"Monogamy is having one spouse. Polygamy is having more than one spouse. Monopolygamy is marrying the Monopoly Guy."

"What's the difference between voicing your opinion on reddit and getting gang raped? In one at least you get some sex out of it."

"What do you call a penis with stamps on it? Male. Of course, if you have to sign for it, it's a package."

"I think I love my girlfriend... But I need to ask Rudy Guliani to be sure."

"What did the lizard get at home depot? Reptile."

"Just got a Hyundai Accent and now I sound like a Korean guy."

"The main reason Santa Claus is so jolly is because... he knows where all the bad girls live. :3"

"""Huge hole found growing on surface of Sun"" *drops string cheese* ""This hole is no cause for alarm"" *picks up string cheese*"

"My fridge exploded. . . And there are pieces of de-brie everywhere."

"People who push and shove to get on a flight before other passengers are possibly going to get to their end destination one second faster."