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Joke of the Day
"I like my women like I like my wine... 12 years old and locked in a cellar"
Next Joke
"What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing...They're both stuck up cunts."
"What did the duck say to the bartender put it on my bill"
"Rick Astley will loan you any movie in his Pixar collection except for one... He's never going to give you Up"
"A man walks into a bar and see three bitches. Because he's a misogynist."
"Respond to every ""How was your weekend?"" today by staring off into the distance & whispering ""So much blood..."""
"I never point fingers at anyone. Though I do have a box of human fingers that I slingshot at people when I feel like blaming them for shit."
"I used to have a phone with a really good user interface... ...but someone swiped it."
"What do vegan zombies eat? ~Graaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnsssssss"
"If Miley Cyrus really wanted to shock us at the VMAs, she'd show up in a burka covered in a snowsuit and slowly add more clothing each hour."