169643

Joke of the Day

"/r/jokes wins Friend of the Planet award! for 95.002% of recylced content."

"Your refrigerators running. Hmmm let me check. My refrigerator is in fact not running. Thanks you kind young anonymous caller. You have saved me from a great deal of spoilage."

"I taught my maths class how to use a protractor, with varying degrees of success."

"How do you agitate an achy feminist runner? massage a knee"

"Why the new Apple Pencil isn't included with the new iPad Pro. There is no point."

"So I heard a new Pope was elected today... His wife and kids must be so proud!"

"So evidently the kid who stabbed all the people at his highschool today was always told he would be famous. He felt like today was the day to take a stab at it."

"What's the difference between America and a bottle of milk? In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture."

"I Hate When Old People Poke You at a wedding and say ""you are Next"". So next time i was at a funeral I poked them and said ""You are Next""."

"4 Jewish women go out for dinner When the waiter checks on them during their meal he asks ""is anything okay?"""