169511

Joke of the Day

"Who the hell buys furniture online? Why would you buy a chair or couch you can't even sit in? What if it has burlap cushions stuffed w/hay?"

"There are two kinds of friends : those who are around when you need them, and those who are around when they need you."

"""If I wanted to see a clown, I would have gone to the circus."" What I actually said: ""Yes, Claire, you're makeup looks lovely today!"""

"What did the priest say about consorting with the sisters of the church? Nun is better!"

"Why do they call it multiple personality disorder and not being a people-person?"

"What comes after March? April, fools!"

"Watch My lesbian friend gave me a Timex for my birthday. I don't think she understood me correctly when I said I wanna watch."

"What aspect of the game do women soccer players like most? Getting that good D"

"Judge threw out a lawsuit against Starbucks said the Plaintiff had no grounds."

"What did the giraffe say to the conspiracy theorist? Nothing, giraffes aren't real."