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Joke of the Day

"Bought the wife some Meatloaf knickers for Xmas. The front says ""I will do anything for love"" On the rear it says ""but I won't do that"""

"You don't need Crossfit if you have to get to the mailbox and back whilst avoiding mosquitoes the size of chihuahuas."

"What is the worst thing to hear after blowing Willie Nelson? ""I'm not Willie Nelson."""

"What do Angels fans and gay men both have in common? They both love Pujols"

"Ppl freakin cuz its sharks in the ocean. News flash: that's where they live! If u see them at Chipotle, then we have a problem"

"I'm glad the Chicago Cubs finally won the World Series. 108 years of hibernation just doesn't seem healthy."

"Your family tree must be a cactus ... Because everyone on it is a prick."

"North Korea claims to have just tested an H-Bomb Turns out they just discovered Mentos and Diet Coke"

"Whats the best part of having sex with a transvestite? Reaching around and pretending it went all the way through."

"Why can't you keep secrets in a bank? Because of all the tellers."