168392

Joke of the Day

"I like to make a sandwich with just cucumbers and pickles... I call it the Before and After"

"Who is the brother of Juan Luna? Edi si AnTWOnio Luna. Yeah yeah, the result of being stuck in the traffic. XD"

"What's the paradox of 'lingerie'? Done right, it doesn't linger."

"I once knew a girl who confused a tube of KY jelly... for a tube of super glue. I asked her how it happened... her lips were sealed."

"Tired of my wife saying I have no feelings. Do I not cry if you turn off Football? Do I not pout when I can't find good porn? I have layers."

"[robbing Walgreens] Would you like to sign up for a Walgreens card? Youll save 30% on your robbery ""sure"" [guy behind me with 1 item] wtf"

"I went into a medical shop. ""Have you got anything for irritation?"" ""Yes,"" he said, ""But where exactly?"" I said, ""Fuck knows, you tell me. It's your shop."""

"What did one amputee say to the other? I'm as stumped as you are!"

"Whats the difference between a truckload of babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can t unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork."

"The world is secretly run by old men playing chess in the park"