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Joke of the Day

"I would tell you an Ebola joke... But you probably won't get it"

"I once put a baby in adult clothing and placed him on my desk with a water bottle labeled ""fountain of youth"" right next to him."

"What is a doctor's most important quality? Patience!"

"The brownies I started making in my Easy Bake Oven in 1987 are ready if you guys want one."

"Why couldnt the feminist screw in a lightbulb? Because there was a glass ceiling."

"To the guy that found my empty wallet... I don't know how to repay you."

"Oxygen is proven to be a toxic gas. Anyone who inhales oxygen will normally dies within 80 years."

"I bought a fleshlight today My masturbation has gotten out of hand"

"What's E.T short for? Because he's got little legs. But seriously, what does ET stand for? Because he can't sit down."

"Dog asks cat, ""We sorta look similar, have four legs and are both furry, you even are a bit smaller. Why in the hell do you have so much respect but I don't?"" Cat: ""You 'bow' while me 'owe'."""