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Joke of the Day

"Variants for running. Variants for running:- 1. Hot girl in front of you. 2. Creepy guy behind you. (If 1 applies to you, you're probably 2)"

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"Women who seek to be equal to men...LACK AMBITION!"
"What's the difference between jelly & jam? I can't jelly my dick down your throat"
"What did the judge say when a skunk entered the courtroom? Answer: Odor Odor in the court!!!"
"Best thing about being a professional bagpiper is.. We get the best blow jobs."
"You had me at, ""we'll make it look like an accident."""
"[robbing Whole Foods] ""All the cash in a bag NOW!"" 100% organic reusable bag ok? ""Yes!"" [puts half the cash] I had to charge for the bag"
"My drug dealer got me shoes for Christmas I dont know what they were laced with, but I've been tripping ever since"
"What do you call an anti-vaxxer? Greiving"
"What happened to the gay wizard? He vanished with a puff!"
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