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Joke of the Day

"I've got the body of a 25 year old supermodel But my fridge is too small... Does anyone have any ideas?"

"What don't BMWs have that all other manufacturers do? Turn signals"

"My dog keeps trying to get my attention but until he plays that Sarah McLachlan song I'm not gonna take him seriously."

"There's three things you should know about me, I'm Canadian, I watch Hockey, and... I'm sorry."

"Dad to his adopted son ""What is the extreme limit of laziness?"" Son ""Having an adopted son."""

"""Let's get down to business!"" -Guy who enjoys dancing to the background noises of a local business"

"If he calls you clingy, move in immediately without warning and decorate his bed with 57 throw pillows"

"Oh, hey guys how were the bars tonight? That's cool. In case you were wondering all of the Harry Potter movies are still really good."

"Before you criticise someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes... That way you're a mile away from them, and as a bonus you have their shoes."

"Why do butter substitutes have such a hard time? Because they're always being marginalized!"