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Joke of the Day

"""Let's get down to business!"" -Guy who enjoys dancing to the background noises of a local business"

"What's the difference between outlaws and in-laws? Outlaws are wanted."

"I bet the cooler math nerds call each other Alge-brahs."

"Spider van Spider van How do spiders drive a van? 10 on top 10 below Where would you like to go? Get in. Get in the Spider Van."

"Want to hear a dumb, old joke? Hillary Clinton. Want to hear a dumber, older joke? Wherefore doth the chicken cross the road? Want to hear the oldest, dumbest joke I've heard? Donald Trump."

"My 6 year old wrote a knock, knock joke today. It My son: knock, knock Me: who's there My son: Nobody Me: Nobody who? My son: penis"

"2 Mexicans got into a fight It was a Juan on Juan"

"Me: Good night, moon. [30 mins later] Moon: I thought you went to bed. I saw you favorite that tweet. Why aren't you reading my messages?"

"I don't lie. I have, however, invented my own language which uses a lot of the same words as English but with somewhat altered meanings."

"I can't believe christmas is 364 days away... And people already have their decorations up."