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Joke of the Day
"When life gives you melons... You're probably dyslexic."
Next Joke
"The state of New Mexico.. When they named the state of New Mexico were they degrading the state or honoring Mexico? it seemed funnier when I first said it. is this how it always happens?"
"""Obama Hires Seahawks Secondary to Intercept Citizen's Texts, Emails"" (Just a fake, Onion-y headline)"
"A college in Boston is offering a major in comedy... One student commented, ""I think I have a future in this. Every time I tell someone what I'm studying, they laugh."""
"Just got back from seeing a chiropractor that guy cracks me up"
"How are martinis like breasts? They are better shaken, not stirred. I usually have one in my hand. One is too few and three are two many."
"What do you call a Spanish midget? A paragraph. Because he's not a full essay."
"When I lay down to go to sleep, I watch Hillary Clinton rallies It is much more convenient than counting sheep individually."
"I want a relationship like from Up. She dies and I get a flying house."
"What sort of cereal does Thor eat? Loki Charms."