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Joke of the Day

"Hedgehogs: why can't they just share the hedge?"

"Did you hear about the Patriots? I personally think it's all overblown."

"Today i realised why my Dad divorced my mom I saw her driving license. she has an F in sex"

"Occasionally, I like to go to Walmart, buy a jar of Vaseline, a cucumber and a Bottle of Gin and wink at the cashier"

"Pete Rose is really bummed that Major League Baseball didn't reinstate him... he was gettin' some great odds bettin' they would"

"On Viagra Guidlines If I was ever able to keep an erection for more than four hours, I would be calling the girl with a visible thong who handed me a pencil in calc, not my doctor"

"Why was Helen Keller so good at fingering herself? She was good reading lips."

"What do you call a Frenchman that wears sandals? Phillipe Floppe Courtesy, my Neuroscience Prof."

"Teacher: What is the difference between lightning and electricity? Alexander: I know you do not have to pay for lightning."

"[flicks cigarette out window] submarine captain: you fool!"