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Joke of the Day

"Teacher: What is the difference between lightning and electricity? Alexander: I know you do not have to pay for lightning."

"My favorite thing to say to old people is, ""When I was your age I didn't believe in reincarnation either""."

"How do you make a female chemist feel self conscious? Ask if her hair is an extensive property"

"My company has a nicotine like addiction to conference calls."

"What's blue and white and can't climb trees? A fridge with a denim jacket on"

"What's the hardest part of a vegetable? His wheelchair"

"What did the man do when he got a big gas bill? He exploded."

"I'm tired of this one night stand mentality in college... I have multiple lamps and alarm clocks, I need at least two night stands."

"Why did the mexican push his wife over the bridge? ""Tequila"""

"Girl: Do you have protection? Me: Um like a sword?"