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Joke of the Day

"TIL four Chinese brothers attempted to invent the airplane but failed miserably Apparently two Wongs don't make a Wright"

"stereotypes are like black people not to be trusted"

"I shake my head at people's stupidity so often that no one will even notice if I get Parkinson's."

"Me: this doesn't seem right Dentist: u know on tv when they say 9/10 dentists M: yeah D: im the one *he resumes hitting my teeth w/ a comb*"

"Took my date to Star Wars and dinner... to make sure BB-8."

"Tim's father has three sons: Snap, crackle, and...? Tim"

"I'm really obsessed with Harry Potter. On a scale of 1-10, how obsessed do you think I am? 9 3/4"

"I'm not saying my ex wasn't pretty, but every time my wallet got stolen the thief would return her picture."

"Why does a pencil shave? To look sharp"

"Son, I haven't slept at all in the past 10 days! Son: Why not? Dad: Because I sleep at night."