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Joke of the Day
"Tim's father has three sons: Snap, crackle, and...? Tim"
Next Joke
"Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Why?' To get to the idiots house! (Immediately follow up with this) Knock knock 'Who's there?' A chicken!"
"How do astronauts make a party? They plan-et."
"[at church] ""I'm here for the blood."""
"What does a musician use to build a house? A tuba-four"
"How do you call it when a blond girl dyes her hair brunette? Artificial Intelligence."
"Did you hear about the guy who won the Nobel for inventing time travel to the future? He was ahead of his time."
"What's the difference between garbanzo beans and chickpeas? I've never paid $200 to have a garbanzo bean in my mouth."
"Some guy beside me farts, so I say : ""Hey! Some arsehole's talking shit behind your back!"""
"How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? How the hell did they get inside a light bulb?"