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Joke of the Day

"My uncle always said ""One in the hand is worth two in the bush."" He died a virgin."

"My super buff friend told me he never uses any fitness supplements... I didn't believe him and said ""no whey?"""

"Melania Trump and this sub are the same Both like to copy stuff and say them again"

"My dad worked on a car assembly line for 40 years. He retired years ago but still struggles with post pneumatic press disorder."

"A LAWYER AND A POLITICIAN What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician? Chelsea Clinton."

"What's the difference between apathy and ignorance? I don't know and I don't care."

"Why did Barty Crouch Jr. stop drinking? It was making him Moody Edit: Guys, its a Harry Potter Joke for those who don't get it."

"Here, let me show you the proper way to micromanage."

"Why don't women wear skirts during winter? They'll get chapped lips!"

"if she doesn't reciprocate ur first ""i love u"", press ur finger to ur strategically placed bluetooth & say ""oh cool u love me too? nice"""