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Joke of the Day

"You'd be shocked at how easy it is to walk into a nursing home and draw mustaches on the dementia patents"

"Its girls like u that cause global warming!"

"What is brown and rhymes with Snoop Dr. Dre"

"What's something you can drive, but also throw? A Fit!!!!!!!!!!"

"Twitter=Whats happening? FB=Whats on your mind? FourSquare= Where am I? Quora=what? Youtube=What Im watching. LinkedIn=Whats in it for me?"

"Why did everyone hate the shoe company? It had no soul."

"Coming soon to NBC: She's a lawyer who, you guessed it, doesn't play by the rules. And he's a doctor who, right again, pees sitting down."

"Why did Michael Sam, the first openly gay NFL player, say he doesn't shop at Sports Authority? Because he prefers Dick's."

"What's a neckbeard's favorite color? M'genta"

"I have an EpiPen I don't need it but I always keep it for sentimental value. A friend of mines gave it to me as he was dying, I don't know why but it seemed very important to him I had it."