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Joke of the Day

"Why did Michael Sam, the first openly gay NFL player, say he doesn't shop at Sports Authority? Because he prefers Dick's."

"Alfred: *placing pancakes in the shape of the Bat Signal* Here are your pancakes, Master W- Bruce: They're Batcakes Alfred. Say ""Batcakes!"""

"An Irish man walks past a bar..."

"BREAKING NEWS! Lorena Bobbitt involved in a road rage incident. She cut off some dick in traffic."

"With a name like Freddy Mercury... shouldn't he have done heavy metal?"

"How do you stay warm in a cold room? You go to the corner cause it's always 90 degrees."

"What did God say when Eve swim in the ocean for the first? He said, ""Oh great, now we'll never get that smell off the fish""."

"What is a zombie's favorite cereal? Raisin brain."

"*mugger walks up* GIMME EVERYTHING YOU GOT! *mugger slowly walks away with $2.16 and a lifetime of anxiety & existential misunderstanding*"

"Doctor... can I bathe with diarrhea? Hmm, yes if you shit enough..."