136077
Joke of the Day
"What's something you can drive, but also throw? A Fit!!!!!!!!!!"
Next Joke
"How is the American public now like Socrates? By November, they will have both picked their poison."
"Gunfire reported at track and field event They said it was race related"
"*gets a Fitbit for Christmas* *puts it on a squirrel*"
"why did the bird-shit did not fall on the man standing under the tree right under the parrot? the bird was wearing underpants."
"ME: Ok, that's everything in the dishwasher *closes dishwasher door* *turns it on* *turns around* TEASPOON: You're not gonna believe this"
"I'm opening a new Dental & Spa treatment center ""We'll fight our competitors tooth and nail for the best prices"""
"I was at the public swimming pool today and decided to have a sneaky piss in the deep end. The lifeguard must have noticed - he blew his whistle so fucking loud, I nearly fell in."
"364 days until Halloween and people already have their decorations up."
"I'm writing code, not making diamonds. Continuing to apply more and more pressure will not produce a better outcome."