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Joke of the Day

"My mom once got drunk and stabbed me because I look like my Father... ...But hey the past is the past. She's sober now and I can finally walk again."

"What is the difference between a dead hooker and spare tire? I only have one spare tire in my trunk!"

"A giraffe walks into a bar, he sits and orders 6 martinis........ Shame on you for wanting a punchline. This giraffe needs help."

"What is Donald Trump's favourite drink? A white Russian."

"What subject did Dracula major in during college? AcCOUNTing This joke must be on a popsicle stick somewhere."

"Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! The job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in his jeans."

"So with the popularity of the recent centaur joke, I was going to make a joke about a half-man, half-goat. I decided against it... it wasn't very fauny anyway."

"A bridge killed my family... We're arch enemies now."

"My phone got married last week. The service was good despite the lousy reception."

"I'm wearing that smile you gave me "