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Joke of the Day

"I farted in an Apple Store today and got thrown out because of it Not my fault they don't have Windows"

"Girls: I'd invite you in but my place is a mess Guys: I don't mind Girls: Like a huge mess Guys: ok Girls: Like dead bodies on fire Guys: ok"

"2 sheep are standing on a hill One turns to the other and says ""Baaa!"". The other sheep says ""I was just going to say that""."

"[Batman at McDonald's] What's your chicken sandwich called? -A McChicken And the rib? -A McRib [pulls out his batwallet] I like your style."

"How do you tell apart a Chinese from a Japanese? With a Geiger Counter."

"""You can tell the quality of a person by how they treat people they don't need."""

"Mickey and Minnie Mouse are going through a divorce. Mickeys lawyer says "" you can't get a divorce because your wife is a little crazy."" To which Mickey replies ""no I said she's Fucking Goofy!"""

"What did iodine say to Xenon when caesium died? Well, I guess we better Barium."

"What Do You See When Pillsbury Doughboy Bends Over? Donuts"

"I took an IQ test today.. The results were inconclusive"