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Joke of the Day

"A baby seal Walks into a club"

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"Yes I brought my own shot glasses and started a party at my table, but is that really a reason to throw someone out? Worst library ever."
"Friend: How's the wine? Me: It's exCHARDONNARY Friend: *taking my glass away* No."
"Reddit is the ultimate safe space for the most oppressed human that ever lived... ...The white middle-class American male."
"*interrupts your heartfelt story* Oh NOW I hear your New York accent!! Say ""dying wish"" again! Ok now say ""coffee""!"
"Apparently 50% of people prefer pizza to sex. What is wrong with people? Have they never had pizza?"
"What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in"
"The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Unless he's a Vegetarian. Then you can get there through his vagina."
"What's the difference between Jack Daniel's and General Custer? Jack Daniel's is still killing indians."
"Will glass coffins be a success? Remains to be seen."