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Joke of the Day

"So a 14 year old girl goes to the doctor for a checkup... He puts the stethoscope up to her heart and says, ""Big breaths."" And she says, ""Thankth! I grew them mythelf!"""

"So if Valentine's Day is for couples, then the other 364 days are for me, right?"

"If the wife uses dual sim phone, save both numbers under one name : ""Wife"" Never save them as ""Wife1"" and ""Wife2"" ~ A husband from hospital"

"Those luxury car ads with a sexy couple zigzagging through the hills should really end with the passenger puking on the side of the road."

"So my 10yr old & her friends were talkin about 'seizures' in class & this random kid yells out 'I LOVE their breadsticks!' Can I adopt him?"

"Where does the cynic go to pray The Cynicgogue"

"Did you hear about the old Italian chef? He pasta way"

"My friend is deaf in his left ear. His hearing is alright."

"What did one cow say to the other? Hey moo!"

"your dirty mind "" Give it to me"" she yelled, ""i am so fucking wet, give it to me now"" She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella."