74179

Joke of the Day

"Those luxury car ads with a sexy couple zigzagging through the hills should really end with the passenger puking on the side of the road."

"A real man should never wave faster than he SAYS the word ""hey"""

"What's the difference between a pineapple and the White House? A pineapples pricks are on the outside."

"My social life."

"Facebook is down, so don't say prayer doesn't work."

"If Arnold does star in the new Predator movie.. He would probably be sent back in time with his Expendables team to kill the Predator who was the actual John Connor."

"If I was a gay dude, I'd be all like ""Not tonight, I had Taco Bell for lunch."""

"If everyone had a gun, we wouldn't have to worry about gun violence. This is why war zones are noted for their safety."

"Just yelled ""out of my way monsters!"" at a flock of seagulls, so I'm done interacting socially for the day"

"The only way I'd be scared of a ghost is if one was coming at me wearing a fitted sheet that I thought I'd have to eventually fold."