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Joke of the Day
"Starting to think these Herman Cain commemorative coins were a bad investment."
Next Joke
"May the bards singeth this song henceforth on the 31st of August Oh my god its a happening My balls I am a grappling A tree grown from a sapling On the day that was the fappening"
"How many beans are in Irish bean soup? Two-thirty-nine. One more and it'd be too farty."
"Got kicked out of the casino again. Apparently, gold chocolate coins mess up their slot machines or something."
"Did you blow Bubbles when you were a child? Because I saw Bubbles today and he wanted your number."
"*throws king crab into tank of normal crabs* Go, lead them to freedom, this is your birthright"
"Q: Where do cows go on Friday nights? A: To the moovies."
"University.... Close to being unemployed but with your parents still being proud of you"
"Why did the man put a dead tiger on his lawn? To scare off Cat burglars!"
"You've got 99 problems huh? Boo-Hoo. I have a mortgage and a shitty job. Now go fuck Beyonce in a $300,000 car."