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Joke of the Day

"Me: Make sure Jnr. gets straight A's...[slides envelope] Teacher: Is this what I think it is? Me:[nods] You can use it to send letters & stuff"

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"So there are the baby boomers, generation x, and millenials. What do we call the next generation? Fucked."
"If Paula Deen's new cookbook isn't titled 'Fifty Shades of Gravy', I'm going to lose a considerable amount of money on the bet I just made."
"To quote Balltaire, ""Do not wax there!"""
"I wonder if these beers are performance enhancing. I'm feeling pretty awesome!!"
"Whatisthelongbuttonatthebottomofthekeyboardfor?"
"My milkshake brought a colony of extremely aggressive fire ants to my yard. :("
"findafamilymember.com Now the #1 Dating Site in Texas!"
"Voted class president. Assassinated."
"2 blondes are on their way to Disneyland... they see a sign reading ""Disneyland left"". So they cried a bit and headed home."