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Joke of the Day

"2 blondes are on their way to Disneyland... they see a sign reading ""Disneyland left"". So they cried a bit and headed home."

"""I trust my boyfriend, I would never go thru his phone"" -girls who can't figure out boyfriend's passwords"

"What do you call a fat computer? A Dell"

"*comes into work with black eye* oh please I'm fine guys! But you shoulda seen the other guy. He was a cabinet door that i walked into"

"I went to see Walt Disney on ice It was a bit disappointing, just an old bloke in a freezer."

"Wile E. Coyote's Amazon reviews of Acme products are pretty scathing."

"I never understood how a mother could lift a car with a child trapped under, until my phone got stuck under my bed."

"I just clogged a urinal?"

"Three Tampons are walking down the street, which one doesnt talk to you? None of them, they are all stuck up cunts"

"I keep having flashbacks to my emo phase. I think I might have PTXD."