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Joke of the Day
"For valentine's day, I got a new car for my wife I thought that was an awesome trade"
Next Joke
"Wanna know the difference between a street performer and a hobo? The age"
"What do you call a psychic who simply doesn't care? Telapathy"
"What did the kid with no hands get for Christmas? No one knows, he hasn't opened his presents yet."
"I'm anti-thesaurus, for lack of a better word."
"You should feel pretty honoured if I subtweet you. But the tweet you think is about you, probably isn't. Twitter's hard. Get a helmet."
"Just heard a woman ask if she left her teeth over there Really hoping this is Halloween related"
"What do you call a fat kid with 3 teeth and a lazy eye? Names."
"A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, But I soon realized that toucan play that game."
"What did the old maid get the vasaline for? 84 cents. Joke by my grandfather"