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Joke of the Day
"What's red, 6 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her. Her miscarriage."
Next Joke
"And now for the most stupidest joke ever. How do you say the word ""peanuts"" *without* the letter ""t""? Think about it."
"What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison"
"So Lisa said she wanted to be friends with benefits Where's my dental plan, you slut? (source, college humor)"
"Why do fencers have the most karma on this sub? They are skilled at riposting good content"
"What do plums and bunnies have in common? They're both purple, except bunnies...bunnies aren't purple :/"
"We're gathered here today to mourn the loss of Derek. His last words were ""Watch me try and keep my eyes open while sneezing!"""
"BUILDING INSPECTOR: what's this called DARTH VADER: the death [inspector's eyes look up from his clipboard] DARTH VADER: uh the health star"
"Next time a job interviewer asks where you see yourself in 5 years, say ""Why TELL you when I can SHOW you?"" then just sit there for 5 years."
"Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the last one who had a dream got shot!"