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Joke of the Day

"So there's this cute girl from work and I'm too shy to talk to her But then I realized, all I needed to do to talk to her was to remove the duct tape"

"My grandfather got his tongue shot off during WWII He never talked about it."

"What's the difference between a dentist and a sadist? Newer magazines."

"Said the masochist to the sadist: ""Oh hit me, hurt me, oh please just use me"" Said the sadist to the masochist: ... no"

"wow, i thought what we had was special, you met my family and made me dinner, now you say you're a ""waiter"" and you're just ""doing your job"""

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay to have a garbanzo bean on my face."

"Dark humour It's like a child with cancer.... It never gets old."

"What was the name of King Arthur's fattest knight? Sir Cumference. (He ate too much pi)"

"Did you hear about the actress who stabbed her husband at dinner? That blonde girl Reese.... Not Witherspoon, with her knife."

"I should get a bigger tax return According to Digiorno's I'm a family of four."