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Joke of the Day

"A horse walks into a bar, orders a beer. The bartender says, ""Why the long face?"" And the horse answers, ""They've started a round of layoffs at the plant."""

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"What do you call a deer without eyes? No-eye deer! Note: we are from Hicksville, USA. This may not make sense without the Midwestern accent."
"Not realizing today's date, I just made a Pearl Harbor joke to someone... Needless to say, it bombed."
"Why did Simba's father die? He couldn't Move Fasa"
"Little boy has diarrhea and tells his mom he needs viagra Mom replies "" What the hell for?"" Boy replies ""Isn't that what you give dad when his shit doesn't get hard?"""
"If God hadn't meant the pussy to be eaten, he wouldn't have made it look like a taco."
"""You get a Bible! You get a Bible! You get a Bible! You all get Biibbbllleess!!!! ~Poprah"
"What is the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer? The taste."
"What do you call a lady pig planting seeds? A sow sow."
"If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?"