161974

Joke of the Day

"I'm close to $100,000 deep in student loans for my English degree and I just used the word ""awesome"" 10 times in a row to describe a guy."

"*gets bitten by a radioactive bear *before developing super powers, gets eaten by radioactive bear"

"The most sexist joke you've ever heard. Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; give a man a vagina and you feed her for a lifetime."

"Stop letting your dogs piss on fire hydrants. Some of us use those for parkour."

"What does a Texas tornado and a Tennessee divorce have in common? Either way, someone is losing a trailer."

"""Must you lick the knife?"" ""Sorry,force of habit"" I said ""Loads of people do it though, don't they?"" ""Yes, but not during surgery, Doctor"""

"Over 400 billion people a year are victims of exaggerated statistics."

"How does Hasbro test tickle me elmo's? They have test-tickles."

"How do you get a hippie to jump off a cliff? Tell them it will ""cleanse toxins."""

"What do FRENCH people order from McDonald's FRENCH fries hahaha"