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Joke of the Day

"I think a gay guy hit on me in a bar... He was passing behind me and asked ""Do you mind if I push in your stool?"""

"What are condoms? Something your worthless fuckup of a father couldn't afford."

"*knock at the door* ""H...hello?"" ""Hi, i'm not a mouse"" ""Phew, that's good because im a large block of cheese, lemme just open thARGGGHHHHHHH"

"Did it Hurt When You Fell From Heaven Straight Into Hell?"

"Don't say ""tits."" It's crass and disrespectful. Instead, say ""lady tits."""

"He drove his car into a tree And found out how the Mercedes bends"

"It's funny when my wife gives me the silent treatment'. Because she thinks it's a punishment."

"My beard has grown so much. It's time to ... shampoo."

"Does this subreddit like jokes about sodium? ""Na"""

"I wish mirrors and pictures would get together already and agree on what I really look like."