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Joke of the Day

"Want the secret to success? Want 2x the energy without having to diet? Want to add 20 years to your life? Want less shoulder hair? Me too."

Next Joke
 
"the reason i dont wear specific colors on 9/11 when someone asks me why im not wearing red on 9/11 i tell them ""because im not celebrating a muslim holiday"""
"This sushi restaurant has the worst service. ""Ma'am this is an aquarium"""
"Knock Knock Who's there ! An author ! An author who ? An author joke like this and I'm off !"
"Why did the nuke switch course? Because a girl on the ground said ""I have a boyfriend"" later that day the nuke fell into depression"
"Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?"
"Friend at work hit me with this. (Sorry if repost.) If a Stork brings white babies, and a Crow brings black babies. What brings no babies? The Swallow."
"What do you call a deer... without eyes? No eye deer. without eyes or legs? Still no eye deer. without eyes, legs, or genitalia? Still no fucking eye deer."
"You know what really grinds my gears? Oxidation"
"I just dropped 15 pounds! But don't worry, I unplugged the toilet afterwards."
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