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Joke of the Day
"I call all dogs 'puppies', regardless of age. They like it."
Next Joke
"Every time your kid starts crying when they don't get what they want, just say ""I don't negotiate with terrorists."""
"Fifteen years ago we had Johnny Cash, Steve Jobs and Bob Hope. Now we have no cash, no jobs and no hope."
"I burnt my Hawaiian pizza last night. I should have used aloha setting."
"Ever since I ate that Dominos artisan style pizza I can't stop painting my bathroom."
"My girlfriend told me she almost choked on her birth control this morning. It looks like it almost did it's job."
"Finally cleaned out the fridge to make meal planning easier. Tonight, we're having buttered olives with mustard and baking soda."
"Condoms... Are for pussies."
"I was going to make a joke about testicles But I better not. It seems to make people teste."
"What's the difference between me and a cardboard box? A cardboard box isn't always empty on the inside. :("