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Joke of the Day

"I forgot to go to the gym again today. That's like 8 years in a row now."

"There should be a warning label on those straw cowgirl hats middle-aged women wear on vacation that reads: ""Will cause freckled cleavage."""

"Apparently, people in Dubai don't like the Flintstones... ...But people in Abu Dhabi DOOOOOOO!"

"Cannibalism is a real thrill Nail-biting from start to finish."

"I've put a hole in a bar of soap and I use it to masturbate. Normally I wouldn't share this kind of information, but I just have to cum clean."

"What's a ghost's favorite sexual act? A boooooooooooobjob"

"What do you call someone who can't find a job? A Psych major. (Pls list your own response - if you're awake and in America at this time, you should have a pretty good one). Thanks."

"what's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants? Ones a crusty bus station and ones a busty crustacean!"

"Seven days without Mexican food.... Makes Juan weak."

"DISPATCH: we have a report of a robbery in progress four blocks from your current location HOT AIR BALLOON COP: I'll be there in 80 days"