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Joke of the Day

"How to get a woman: 1) find one who sells cars 2) take a test drive 3) just keep driving She's yours now, plus you have a new car."

"And I thought I hated Mondays.... But Robin Williams really! Hated Mondays"

"Knock knock! **Who's there?** *Tank* **Tank who?** *You're welcome*"

"All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face."

"They say drugs will hurt your long term memory but I kind of take pride in needing to Google the proper spelling of ""Bieber"" every damn time"

"""GRAAAAAAIIIINNNNS"" Vegetarian Zombie"

"What do you call a cow that's had an abortion? Decaffeinated! Bah dum dum...ting"

"What's the last thing a stripper does with her asshole before starting her shift? Drops him off at band practice."

"How can you tell the difference between normal and self-raising flour? One has parents"

"Cabbage get merried to Onion Friends ask them about wedding nigh . . . . . . . Cabbage told them in sad way ""What wedding night, it tooks whole night to undress each other""."