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Joke of the Day

"What do a dwarf and a midget have in common? Very little."

"[Biker gang] ME: Do we or do we not ride our bikes at the same speed? BIKER: OK, but you need to stop saying we ""synchronize our cycles."""

"Seriously wondering how many times is it appropriate to say ""What?"" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?"

"Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the last one that had a dream got assassinated"

"Why did Pee-wee Herman cross the road? He was choking the chicken."

"I saw this incredible color in a dream, But it was just a pigment of my imagination."

"How did the possessed lady lose weight? Diet and exorcise."

"Who decided to call them ""children"", and not 'snot machines'."

"This guy's all like ""I think you've had enough beers for one night."" Then I'm all ""Fuck you, fridge. Appliances can't even talk."""

"After years of hard work and dedication, I can finally say that I have that sexy body I've always wanted. It's in my freezer."