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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes when I attempt to make a joke as reply-all to a group email chain I hit the wrong button & just make joke to 1 weirded out person"

"stadium announcer: ""STADIUM!"""

"What is a time travelling vacuum cleaner called? Dr Whoover"

"What do you call an old skeleton's jokes? *Dry humer!*"

"My friend came over and left his laptop on the floor. My mother thought it was a scale. Conclusion: My mother weighs 950 dollars."

"How do you make a Swiss Roll? Push him down a hill. BONUS: How do you make French Wine? Invade."

"People who love dark chocolate are always so snobby about it. Relax. It's just chocolate, you elitist ninnies."

"My girlfriend is a midget and I'm nuts over her"

"A police man saw a black man beating up an old lady. Why didn't he do anything? Because he wasn't racist!"

"My uncle always said ""One in the hand is worth two in the bush."" He died a virgin."