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Joke of the Day
"If it weren't for snow blowers... The UPS man wouldn't come."
Next Joke
"How do you know a moth is gay? Its balls are deep in the closet."
"Fact if it's mother is trapped under a car, baby adrenaline gives a baby the super strength of eight babies. But that's not enough babies!"
"The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears."
"I want to follow a random family around Disneyland for a day and just be in the background of all of their photos."
"[god designing humans] Angel: there was a mix-up at the factory. The intestines are way too long God: *stuffing em all in there* I got this"
"why yes i studied sports medicine at the university of phoenix. *puts stethoscope on basketball, nods*"
"Who knows how to sing Mariah Carey songs? Not Mariah Carey"
"What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names"
"Thank you, iPhone predictive text, for sending my mother a message that said ""WOOOOFUCKYEAH!"" There's no joke here except I'm 30 & grounded."