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Joke of the Day

"Jewish jokes. 1: How do you pick up a Jewish girl? - A dustpan 2: How do you get a Jewish girl's number? - Roll up her sleeve."

"What kind of vitamin does a pirate take? Vitamin sea."

"What do trees take when they have a headache? Aleve."

"Well, well, well... If it isn't the lesson I should've learned by now."

"What do they tell people who flunk out of astronaut academy? ""The sky's the limit for you""."

"Did you hear the one about the subatomic particle that refused to pay the bus fare? It just lepton."

"People who email you Spam...Email them Porn! Problem solved "

"That bitch... Two necrophiliacs were chatting on the phone. One says to the other,""So how's the girlfriend?"" He replies, ""Eh, the rottin cunt split on me last night."""

"A mugger was able to lure a woman very easily behind the building where he always sits... She was right up his alley."

"Girl in front of me at the store this morning bought a Kool-Aid Burst and a big Slim Jim. Heroes walk amongst us, folks. Real life heroes."