158549

Joke of the Day

"My neighbourhood barber just got arrested for selling drugs. I've been a customer for 6 years. I never knew he was a barber."

"How long does it take a necrophiliac to screw in a light bulb? Not long... they like to do it while it's still warm."

"The forecast isn't calling for rain so I'm just going to wash my car to prove the weatherman wrong"

"What's the difference between an old bus stop and a crab with breast implants? One is a Crusty Bus Station and the other is a Busty Crustacean"

"The truth about cardiovascular health!"

"To the guy with the friend who dates Asians.... Maybe he just needs some time to re-orient himself?"

"What did Brad Pitt in Seven and Harvey Weinstein in real life both get? Gwyneth Paltrow's head."

"What is a firefighter's favorite video game console? Wii U Wii U Wii U Wii U HINT: Say it outloud"

"Never own a pet store. Stores make bad pets."

"A redditer clicks on a link.. realizes they are the joke."