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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a guy with no nuts and a horn on his head? A eunucorn."

"We would have discovered the cure for cancer by now if we rewarded, recognized and respected our scientists just as much as we do our sportsmen and celebrities."

"Why did the scientist regret naming the organism ""Fungus""? Because after they hung out Gus was actually a pretty boring guy."

"What did Voltaire eat for Thanksgiving? Candide yams"

"What animal should you never play cards with? A cheetah"

"What's orange, and sounds like a parrot? A carrot."

"HIM: isn't wintertime just so romantic ME (smiles & my lips crack open & blood starts pouring down my chin): oh definitely"

"Why can't the bicycle stand on its own ? Because its two tyred"

"My neighbor is a micro biologist. I've never seen him."

"imagine a reverse pizza. the missing hole on the table where the pizza is meant to be. everything else is pizza. the solar system. the air."