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Joke of the Day

"We would have discovered the cure for cancer by now if we rewarded, recognized and respected our scientists just as much as we do our sportsmen and celebrities."

"too soon? Knock knock? Who's there? 9/11! 9/11 who? So much for ""NEVER FORGET"""

"""Meetings"" What a Jamaican calls everything he owns."

"What do Engineers use as birth control? Their Personality."

"I accidentally sent a dick pic to everyone in my address book. Not only was I embarrassed it cost me more than $50 in stamps."

"The cannibal nervously decided to try his first human meal Much to his dismay, he got cold feet"

"Waiter waiter this lobster's only got one claw. It must have been in a fight sir. Then bring me the winner."

"Phones are getting smarter and thinner. People, not so much."

"I've come to the conclusion that these Paul Walker jokes aren't funny... Cause I called his family and told them 5 of my BEST ones. They didn't laugh at ANY of them."

"A guy walks into a doctors office with a carrot in his ear and a piece of celery up his nose. The doctor told him he wasn't eating right."