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Joke of the Day

"Danger is my middle name. First name: Avoid. Last name: At-All-Costs-Like-A-Total-Pussy"

"Two Fish Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, ""Do you know how to drive this thing?"""

"Solution to world hunger: food. Boom, done, next problem."

"Molestation is no laughing matter. For most, its a very touchy subject."

"Why was Hitler a pussy? Because he had nein lives!"

"Maybe Jesus went black, and that's why he isn't coming back."

"The key to wrapping presents is to think outside the box."

"Why was Karl Marx arrested for brewing a cup of Earl Grey? Because all proper tea is theft."

"What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Cliff."

"Perhaps the most gut wrenching part of my day is the moment I look in my fast food bag to see if they remembered my straw"