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Joke of the Day

"I sleep better naked Why can't this flight attendant understand that?"

"I can cut a piece of wood just by looking at it. It's true, I saw it with my own eyes!"

"You can only regret what you remember. -Tequila"

"IDEA: Cry HoleTM - the hole you can cry in"

"Time to buy a new car, a bigger TV, a better cell phone and a faster laptop so I'll finally be happy! (Repeat over and over until you die)"

"Tarzan was tired when he came home. ""What have you been doing"" asked Jane. ""Chasing a herd of elephants on vines"" ""Really ?"" said Jane. ""I thought elephants stayed on the ground !"""

"What do you call it when you can't see your skin? Pore resolution"

"What'd the farmer say when he lost his tractor? ""Where's my tractor?"""

"The Farmer's New Cock A farmer buys a new young cock. As soon as he gets it home, the cock rushes to Reddit and steals someone else's joke."

"The inventor of throat lozenges has died today. There will be no coffin at his funeral."