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Joke of the Day

"Did you know that Diarrhea can kill you? Even if you only drink a little bit."

"No one shows their true character more than when they are retrieving their bags from baggage claim"

"Where did the kid with adhd go? Aushwitz"

"Eye no howe too spiel"

"What did the door say to the other door? I can see your Knob Simple yet effective"

"Why would anyone come on Twitter JUST to argue? Don't you have an ex, or a spouse, or a family member that you can argue with?"

"Went to the zoo today. There was only one animal. It was a ""shitzu."""

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? *choking sound"

"You don't know something? Google it. You don't know someone? Facebook it. You can't find something? MOM!"

"I hate when people ask me where I see myself in 3 years. Do I look like I have a 2020 vision?"