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Joke of the Day

"This season of Game of Thrones set new records for Piracy Probably because it's written by George Arrrrr Arrrrr Martin"

"[in ambulance after being shot] can we [coughs blood] stop at Taco Bell? ""Don't be stupid! [turns around while driving] of course we can"""

"What is the title of a show where children pawn items? Child Pawnography"

"I'm sorry your husband of 50 yrs is dead. Here is a casserole made with Campbells Soup. ~White people."

"I once saw three holes in the ground. Well, well, well."

"I farted today and 4 people turned around.. I felt like I was on The Voice."

"Being a child is like being drunk. Everybody remembers what you did exept you."

"I have invented a kitchen cleaner that kills 0.1% of bacteria. I plan to sell the secret to Dettol."

"Welcome to Plastic Surgery Patient Anonymous! I see a lot of new faces here and frankly, I'm disappointed."

"Life is like a bowl of soup. You only get blown if you're hot."