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Joke of the Day

"I don't remember 6th grade science being this hard. But then again, in 6th grade, I wasn't trying to do homework after 3 glasses of wine."

"I'm thrilled that you found Jesus. Where was he hiding?"

"True Story, When I was a kid, my parents would always say ""Excuse my French"" just after a swear word. I'll never forget that first day at school when my teacher asked if any of us knew any French."

"How can you tell your sister is on her period? Your dad's cock tastes like blood."

"Gandalf: It is in men that we must place our hope Elrond: Have you seen their tweets"

"I named my penis ""Che Guevara""... ... because he strikes fast and retracts even faster. ^^^Also ^^^he ^^^has ^^^a ^^^funny ^^^beard."

"I like my women like I like my wine... Twelve years old and in the cellar."

"What's the best way to cheer on an electrician? You con-du-it!!!"

"What did Hitler eat for breakfast? Luftwaffes"

"Why did the marijuana addict always turn his supply packet around when buying it? He heard the grass is greener on the other side"