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Joke of the Day

"I was going to make a gay joke.... butt fuck it"

"There's 10 kind of people in the world. Those who know binary and those who don't."

"How can you tell if a bee is on the phone? You get a buzzy signal."

"Why did Simba's dad die? Because he didn't Muv-fasta"

"We all know how Bill cheated on Hillary with Monica Lewinsky. Well, did you hear that Hillary cheated on Bill with somebody named Ben Ghazi?"

"Scottish Independence"

"The worst part of a photographic memory is keeping all the negatives."

"The wife & I fought last night. Saying things that can't be taken back. Like perishable goods. Baby food. DVDs with broken seals. Underwear."

"Walked into a very expensive restaurant, sat down, was handed a menu. Comic Sans. Got up and left. Life is hard."

"Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he saw the gas bill."